A MAN’S PERSPECTIVE ON INFIDELITY

A MAN’S PERSPECTIVE ON INFIDELITY

Hello,

So I have been accused of not being fair in my sample collection. I have also been accused of being “pro-decent women”, being a feminist in my blog and not asking the males what goes on in their mind. I took the initiative to then go and ask a couple of regular “omo boys” about their perspective on fidelity/infidelity.

O.G is a single, working class guy who is less than 30, I know him a bit and know his ways. After reading my last post, I asked him what his thoughts on it were and why the trend is changing.

Me: Hey, so what’s your thoughts on this whole body count thing?

O.G: I don’t know. It doesn’t really bother me.

Me: So why guys unfaithful generally?

O.G: Now, that’s rather unfair. You are generalizing everyone. I’m a good guy.

Me: Right, I know of at least 6 of your escapades and I don’t monitor you, so tell that to your girls.

O.G: The truth is women will never understand. I guess we are built differently. I’m not trying to sound vulgar but there isn’t anything like a new hit.

Me: *RME* Really? So because a new hit, you are willing to destroy years of a relationship.

O.G: Hmmm, that means you are assume I’m thinking. You don’t think of home girl. Na, it’s a just do it thing. It’s about the chase. After hitting it, you realise it’s the same old thing and might not even be as good as home-girl.

Me: So why bother if it’s the same old thing?

O.G: I don’t know! Maybe we are just dumb.

Me: I guess you are. Hiss. So how would you feel if home girl does the same?

O.G: wow!! That would really hurt me. It takes a lot for a girl to cheat. It’s more emotional for her. We have the ones who do it for the fun of it but a regular girl, it means more.

Me: So if it hurts you, why do you do the same to her?

O.G: you still assume we think about it. We don’t think about it. Don’t think of the pros or cons, nor how it makes home girl feel; we just do it. Girls think about the pros and cons of cheating, I guess that’s why you guys try to rationalize when a man cheats.

Me: I can’t understand it sha. I guess Men are from Mars and women are from Venus.

Now, the next interview was O.U, a 30 something year old who is married and I also happen to know of his escapades. I do need new male friends. Sigh

Me: Hey, so what’s your thoughts on this whole body count thing?

O.U: well, it used to bother me before. I didn’t want to be with anyone who had a high body count but I have realised that body count is a social construct that has double standards. It’s ok for a guy to have a HBC but we tell women not to do the same. Both men and women have needs, and these needs have to be met.

Me: you lot have a problem, so amassing body count is how to meet your need?

O.U: Na you know, stop being judgemental.

Me: what’s your take on infidelity?

O.U: I think it’s more of an ego thing. You see this girl with like 50 guys on her case. You think these guys have nothing on me. You start the chase. You hit it several times, get bored and move on. Usually takes a time of 2-3 months.

Me: So what of the Mrs? Do you think about the fact you are hurting her? What if she find out?

O.U: you assume we think about the consequences *at this point, I had started rolling my eyes and kmt, O.U and O.G were beginning to sound alike*

Me: you must think the Mrs, stupid when you say that she won’t find out.

O.U: I don’t think so, I don’t even think about the fact she would find out.

Me: How would you feel if the Mrs cheats on you?

O.U: well, we will move on no ni.

Me: Move on together or apart?

O.U: Together, I guess I deserve what I get!

Me: O ba e yi. (Literal translation: it’s rolling with you)

O.U: What you fail to realise is that a man cheats with a new ***** while a woman cheats with a familiar person. That is the reason women try to understand why men cheat. For women, there is an emotional investment so they can’t fathom why you have something with someone you have no feelings for.

Me: You don’t have feelings for them? Ha!! Ok o!! So why do it in the first place? What if you catch feelings?

O.U: The rule is, you don’t go after someone you see yourself settling for. That’s getting things complicated. You have to avoid that.

Me: in other words, you go for the loose ones?

O.U: Not really, just someone you don’t like.

Me: It is well with your souls. I shall pray for you.

So my darlings, these are words from the regular Lagos omo boys. What are your thoughts???? Do you share their opinions?

Drop a comment and don’t forget to share.

XOXOXOXO

FM